You are all bastards. You fucked us up in Brisbane – don’t you know we always win at the Gabba? I mean, ALWAYS! That’s why it’s always the first test, you losers.
I’m bringing in Bolly and Harris, but I’m not telling you who is sitting the next test out. None of you are safe. That’s all I’ll say: none of you are safe. Except Xavier-the-not-Nathan. Although he was just as awful as the rest of you, he’s not Nathan. So he’s fine.
I’m also safe. Although I was also quite rubbish at times, I’m the captain so I can’t be touched. You know, until we lose and I get axed … but until then, I’m the boss and I’m telling you that none of you are safe so start the begging. And I could use some gifts. My ipod got some of Pup’s hair spray on it the other day and is sounding a bit off.
Mitch, your bribe gift had better be fucking huge.
Blog post by Kirby, Thoughts from the Dustbin